By Kris Fritz
(December 5, 2025)
I read with interest David Hoff’s article, qualifying the need for coaches to build relationships with student athletes. Despite not having his resume of Olympic coaching experience, I, too, have coached for over 35 years at the high school level before my retirement from teaching/coaching. At that time, I worked mostly with Girls’ Track & Field, which is not only a minor sport within the high school setting, but it was also ‘just a girls’ sport,’ so until our program started winning regularly and then hosted two international AU teams, no one paid much attention.
I am totally in agreement with Mr. Hoff’s article’s premise of ‘relationships matter.’ During my tenure, we built up our program, included all athletes and parents and developed a culture of inclusion while striving to improve at every meet. Throughout the year, we had family fun events, potlucks, and a coach/ parent/ athlete overview meeting to set the tone for the upcoming season – all helping to build relationships among participants. During the initial meeting, a ‘playbook’ was distributed containing: team schedule and procedures, team records, volunteer sign-ups for parental assistance at meets, current articles on event-specific knowledge, nutrition, inspirational quotes, seasonal messages from the coaches, and information on the end-of-season culminating award event. All information served to build team relationships.
Coach Hoff suggested that despite developing relationships, ‘this does not mean that there won’t be some tough times’ . . . . And he is spot on! We experienced the death of one of the boys’ team members and a subsequent car accident involving four of our girls (leaving one paralyzed). It was previously developed relationships that helped us move through a season where we only scored nine points at our Conference meet. Yet, ultimately, our program returned to being ‘back on track’ with more meaningful interpersonal relationships and many years of winning performances.
In addition to affirming Mr. Hoff’s article, I would add two concepts directly related to relationship building: Problem Solving and Decision Making. The following is a true narrative about such and illustrates the progressive development of four relay participants as they move toward adult life through athletics.
During a Regional Qualifying meet (at which WI coaches are not allowed in the competition area unless there is an issue), I gave my lead 4 x 100 Relay runner the official card containing the 6 names to be presented to the official for final check-in and I took my place in the bleachers with some parents/ coaches. One of the relay participants was running the open 400 before the relay, having done so in other meets with no anticipated problems. That race was run and the individual won and I could see recovery was fine, so we watched from the bleachers as the relay was called.
Several heats were run and our girls were in the marshalling area. When they went to their respective exchange zones and the ‘flag was up’ to begin, a parent says, “Hey, coach, did you change the running order?” I looked out onto the field and, sure enough, the girls were not in the expected zone areas.
I told the parent “no” and barely got my watch on the gun to do splits.
All exchanges were clean and they won, qualifying for Sectionals. When I went down under the bleachers following the race, I questioned the girls as to ‘what was going on?’
One girl quickly said, “We changed the order. We thought that if Renee ran last, she would have more time to rest.”
The result was a win and their best time of the season. When I ventured to ask, “What if it had not worked out?” They were all united in their response, “We knew it would. We all practiced all hand-off spots all season. We talked it over and voted to do it! We agreed to be OK with whatever happened.”
To this day, I still don’t know how I managed to ‘relay’ what I had just been told to my assistant coaches and the parents, but I am proud of the problem-solving and decision-making in which four young women were involved that day.
Likewise, despite my personal trepidation at the sound of the gun, the resultant scenario is what we as coaches wish all of our athletes would have the courage to achieve. And, I know it truly did evolve based upon a season and even prior seasons of relationship building. Therefore, I fully support starting with relationships and then tackling the X’s & O’s when coaching. Kudos to Dave Hoff for reminding us to do so!
